I made a mistake this week by scheduling three events to happen at the same day and time. Of course, I couldn’t be on a phone call, have a contractor over to the house, and get a haircut all on Tuesday morning at 11:00. I am constantly in my phone calendar, adding events or moving tasks around. Juggling my schedule of household tasks and creative classes, on top of my daughter’s end-of-school and activity calendar and my husband’s travel schedule is just chaotic. It’s too much!
It’s time for me to slow down and let some things go. I have a five-year-old daughter and I’ve noticed that rather than simply sitting with her, talking with her, or watching her play and grow, I am preoccupied with tasks. She is so often asking me to pay attention, to look up from washing the dishes, putting in the laundry, or from gardening, straightening, litter box cleaning, dinner prep, organizing, vacuuming, and on and on. There are a world of tasks that could take my attention away from her (and they do have to get done at some point). I’m sure I do look up and notice, but my days truly are filled with too much. I enjoy writing, photography, painting, or catching up on e-courses while she’s at school, but that leaves the time that she’s home to catch up on housework, cooking, or grocery shopping.
There’s a happy medium in there, I know. I’m just all of a sudden aware of how tired I am and how I am letting the joy that she brings forth slip through my fingers. I am doing too much… getting too many emails, taking too many classes, saying yes to too many people. How much more of a support and encouragement could I be to her if I were more present with her? And instead of looking through the eyes of annoyance, what if I saw her as the marvel of creation that she is? I can do better at that if my mind is clear of these other distractions. Here we go…
Well done on having the courage to fight the impossible balance
Ah, thank you, Jocelyn. It’s a constant battle with myself. So glad you understand. 🙂
Naomi, being fully present with a child is one of the greatest gifts we are given. We can learn so much from these little ones. Enjoy that sweet little girl each and every day. They grow up so quickly. Thanks for sharing this great reminder to be present in the moment:)
Nancy Jambor recently posted…Affirmations Are Powerful
I applaud your ability to take a step back and see what you might be missing with your little girl. I loved every moment with my son…sometimes the house didn’t get clean or the laundry done…but it was so worth it. He tells me to this very day (he is now 31) that he had the best childhood ever and we are still very close. So yes….slow down, let it go and enjoy that precious child!
Debbie Goode recently posted…One of the Many reasons we live the way we do…..
That is the sweetest that he thanks you now. I try every day to remember to appreciate this time. Thank you for your comment. 🙂
I’ve come to the conclusion that part of the problem is that, somehow as mothers, we feel pressured to infuse meaning into every moment. If I’m not watching my kids pick flowers in the yard, I have somehow missed a moment that I will never get back. I am supposed to feel bad that I have not lived in the present because I was emptying the dishwasher or whatever. After doing this mom-thing for a few years and a few kids now, I am trying to free myself of that and to recognize that part of being a good mom is making sure that my trash bins are emptied and that the clothes are clean. I’m sure in another few years (when my kids are out of the house) I may not feel similarly but that’s how I feel today. 🙂
Yeah, we can’t be everything to everyone and still take care of ourselves. I’ve been feeling overwhelmed and am clearing my calendar of tasks as much as possible. Still, yes, we must get these things done, especially if we’re the only one home to take care of it. 🙂
You may do this already, but I’m getting better at having the little ones help me with some of that stuff, and they LOVE being helpers. We chit chat while we water (they have their own gloves, watering cans and garden tools) and pull weeds. Bea helped me sort stickers from embellishments while I was cleaning the studio. She had a blast going through Gaga’s stuff! It gives us time together while we get some of the things I NEED to do done, and they rarely notice they are “working!” Of course, I then owe them a game of princess snap!
janet forrest recently posted…Thoughts on OO (Operation Organize!)
Yes, I DO have her help because I want her to learn how to do these things and that they are part of running the home. It’s not like a magic fairy comes while we sleep and shops, cooks, cleans, etc. I wish!
I am there with you, Naomi. I’m in the process of letting go and living in the moment too. These are busy times and important years. I’ve found having quiet time in the morning really helpful. Also stepping away from the computer/iPhone when I’m with my kids. So glad you shared. Oh, and remember to pause and breathe.
Kathy
Kathy Anne recently posted…Coming out of the Cocoon
So right, Kathy. It’s a process. 🙂