As promised, here are the nonfiction books I read last month. In case you missed the fiction, it’s here.
I read Becker’s Clutterfree with Kids: Change your thinking. Discover new habits. Free your home and I also like his blog, Becoming Minimalist. He writes from a point of view that I identify with… young family with kids, similar lifestyle. I like how he encourages every person to decide what’s best for them. In this book, he gives general guiding principles that work no matter how you implement them. A quick read and very interesting.
This is a spiritual take on decluttering that says “if you declutter your home, your heart, and your relationships without attending to your roles and responsibilities, you will find yourself so exhausted and burned out that you can’t find the energy to enjoy your life. This is about taking care of it all—making room within it all.” I totally identify with this! It’s about facing those tough emotions, feeling strong, and making mindful decisions. The result is “happiness, peace, relaxation, and rejuvenation.”
I liked that the authors broke the book into a chapter for each room and gave examples, possible intention words for each space, and ended with a summary guide for the room. Their chapter about children’s rooms was awesome. The book concludes with Ten Principles of Spiritual Decluttering.
“Your heart is like a home. The home is like a heart. And you, my friend, can make both places open, light-filled, and a joy to reside in.”
“The commitment to keep our families Jewish is the commitment to continue a remarkable chain going back through the generations. The dreams and hopes of our ancestors depend on our adding another link to the Jewish chain. This is an awesome responsibility, and an ancient one.”
“Growing up with a Jewish identity is beneficial for children because they acquire a sense of who they are, a sense of comfort and belonging that helps them throughout life. Their Jewish experiences growing up add tremendously to their childhood: Chanukah lights and their timeless message; the Passover Seder and its lessons of history, freedom, and hope; the shofar of Rosh Hashanah; the family togetherness of Friday night dinner. Jewish holidays and life cycle events provide fun times, sweet memories, and valuable lessons for life.”
“Being part of a Jewish community provides friends, community, solid values and shared ideals for the whole family. The family is not alone, rather we are part of a community, part of a whole, involved in valuable activities and building valuable relationships.”
This short book covers the role of parents, the types of activities to introduce, the best forms of Jewish education, and becoming part of a community, each section with ways to be a role model and to incorporate this into everyday household life. Kornbluth says wisely, “People don’t walk away from Judaism because it is captivating, exciting, and fun. People leave because they feel that Judaism is old, boring, and disconnected from their lives.” True of any religion, right?
This book has led me to implement a few changes in our home because it speaks of Judaism as a way of life. Among other things, our Jewish art and books are now more visible, we are lighting Shabbat candles every week, and we read and talk more about important values like gratitude, humility, patience, wonder, compassion, etc. We are playing Jewish board games and I am teaching my daughter her Hebrew letters. I love that Kornbluth says we don’t have to be perfect role models, but that just a few small changes can have a positive influence in our children, adding another link in the generations-long chain.
This book had me from its very opening:
“Being the parent of an anxious child can be a roller coaster. While anxious children are often thoughtful and caring, they can also be exasperating and place extra demands on parents in terms of time and emotion. Often extended family and friends do not see the distress being experienced by both the child and his or her immediate family. When a child always seems to be scared of something and begins to miss out on so many of life’s rewards, most parents are desperate to help.”
It covers many kinds of anxieties, with strategies to help kids calm their fears. Anxiety and fearful thoughts are experienced physically, but it is possible to change thought patterns over a period of a few months, which will therefore produce calmer physical reactions.
“The first stage involves helping your child to understand what thoughts are and to become skilled at identifying his or her own thoughts—you started this in the last chapter. The second stage involves helping your child to understand why thoughts are important, and the third stage involves helping your child to challenge worried thoughts by acting as a detective and examining the evidence.”
I seem to read a lot of books that reflect what I already know and believe. This one is a mindful discipline approach that discusses the link between a child’s neurological development and the way a parent reacts to misbehavior. Calmly responding (not reacting), redirecting emotions, and finding win/win solutions are part of the strategy. This way of preserving and strengthening relationships with dignity and communication would work with anyone, not just children.
I practically inhaled this one. Venkatesh was a grad student in sociology at the University of Chicago who befriends a gang leader, getting to know all the families in the housing projects, the police, the various administrators. It was a fascinating read! I loved learning about the economics and social heirarchy of selling drugs, feeling real love toward these families and close friends, and watching a true friendship form between these two unlikely people. Highly recommend.
I totally forgot that Judaism has angels too! This was a bit like reading Greek mythology in that you don’t know what’s really true… According to Doreen Virtue, those who are in touch with angels develop a closer relationship with God and live more peaceful, happy, and confident lives. This book describes the different types of angels and their historical role. The stories in the book are compelling. A quick read.
What have you been reading lately? And are you on Goodreads? I’d love to connect there.
Everything I’ve Ever Read (I think)
I am in awe of all you read. I’ve not read nearly enough lately, and I primarily read fiction. The one that spoke to me most on this list is how to care for your anxious child, to encourage them to grow out of it. I’ve recently realized I grew into an anxious adult. I know that I waste too much emotional energy building up fears (like of the security screening at the airport), but it’s a hard habit to break, at such a late date. Some of my anxieties can be useful, because they force me to plan in detail when I attempt something difficult, but usually they are a burdon. I am afraid that the average American treats these sorts of problems with drugs. I think that watching yourself form the irrational train of thought – and fighting that – is much healthier.
I think those authors have a book for adults also that they wrote first. I was impressed with how compassionate they are… definitely worth looking into. They take baby steps to expose thought patters that can lead to physical reactions of anxiety. I hope it helps you some way.