Wrapping up a transformative year

Am I the same person I was this time last year?  Hopefully we’ve all changed for the better. There have been big a few deep shifts and realizations for me that I’d like to share with you, including some links to my favorite posts.

Rather than concrete accomplishments, which I do have as well, as we wrap up the year I am focusing on the realization that some important perspectives have shifted for me.  One of the Notes from the Universe e-mails I got a few months ago said something like, “You’ve done everything you have to do; now focus on what you want to do.” I have been pondering just what that means.

I am finally at a spot along the path where I can pause.  I don’t know that I’ve ever had that opportunity.  There was school, career, and all-encompassing motherhood.  Now that Sweet Girl is 7, she is able to do some things for herself.  We are probably far from “See ya later mom… I’m going to my room for a few hours,” but we are much better than we ever were before.  (Thank the heavens! Sound the trumpets! Sleeping all night, going in to school on her own, and playing by herself are like gifts from above.)

We are fortunate financially that I can choose how to spend my time.  At first there was pressure (internal) to fill it with online art and photography classes until I hadn’t a spare second.  Then there was volunteering to a mad degree.  Now there is peace.  I am unsure what will come next but I’m not anxious about it anymore.  I am letting my online courses come to their end and not signing up for anything more.  I’d like to come to a point where I have days with nothing particular on my to-do list.  At least, since I have not had any like that, I think I’d like that.

Another shift is letting things go after doing my best to help.  Rather than dwell extensively on school shootings or refugee violence, which actually harms me and those around me, I am taking positive steps toward making each situation better and then seeking a sense of calm in the storm.  I felt good about sending flowers and contributions for the families of the CO shootings and then stop obsessing.

On a less global scale, I truly believe that smiling at people, talking with strangers in a store checkout line as if we live in a small town and we are next-door neighbors, caring for my literal neighbors by tossing their newspaper up to their porch, and generally leaving situations better than I found them can make a difference.  Just being me is making a positive impact somehow.

This fall and thanksgiving, I didn’t put up any decorations, mainly because I didn’t want to spend time on digging them out and putting them up only to have to take them down soon after.  But Mr. B mentioned it later and said he loves the festive feeling at our house when we do take the time to incorporate fun decorations.  I love that the effort really makes that much of a difference to my family.  I realized that the truly little things like clean laundry and warm family meals at the end of the day really do make a welcoming feeling to someone who has been traveling all week or at school all day.  Creating that sense of home is something I value.

And perhaps the biggest shift this year – the ability to simply enjoy.  Enjoy smiles and laughter.  Enjoy dinners around the kitchen table.  Enjoy being together no matter what we are doing and no matter who I am with.  Appreciate the sunshine and the gifts in my life.  Even appreciate the challenges for what they are trying to teach me.

Half a year has passed since my 40th birthday.  That in itself is a shock because it seems like I barely blinked since then! I have filled those moments mostly with hectic rushing and worry, and for what? I will make this next half a year much more purposeful and peaceful.

I would like to care less about what people think of me, live more in line with what I value most, worry less, and spend more time appreciating my life.

Here are some concrete accomplishments off the top of my head:

• Major home decluttering project – streamlined kitchen, toys, closets, media collection, emptied garage.
• Completed play therapy sessions for Sweet Girl’s separation anxiety.
• Spoke up for my own need for quiet house during the day… Mr. B rents an office when he’s in town.
• Began studying Mussar.
• Had several parenting breakthroughs… still awaiting one on how to bring her down slightly from thinking she’s the center of the universe!
• Finished teaching religious school.
• Turned 40.
• Enjoyed trips to Colorado, Florida, and Italy and Croatia.
• Completed Dressing Your Truth course.
• Lost 28 pounds.
• Sweet Girl in first grade = more confident, reading on her own
• Ran a successful school book fair
• Accepted abundance, began letting things go even if not perfect, looking to enjoy experiences more.

STATS:

As far as blog stats go, this is my 93rd post this year.  I’ve been blogging for a few weeks shy of 5 YEARS with a total of 791 posts!! The most popular post in 2015 was Soulful home: more is less (429 views) and the one with the most comments (30) was April reading roundup.

I love this stuff! Here are a few of my favorite posts from this year:

CREATIVITY:

Do what ignites your soul: a permission slip for stay-at-home moms

PARENTING:

• Using effective limits – 2 parenting book reviews
• The stepladder approach
• Where is your thinking spot?
• How to grow a materialistic child
• Motherhood vs. otherhood
• How to decode secret messages in your child’s behavior
• As she turns 7 – parenting in the age of YouTube

PERFECTIONISM:

• Not doing it all and definitely not at 100%
• Nobody’s perfect
• Going from type-A to, um, type A 1/2?
• Balanced living… what’s that?

ENERGY:

• Are you fighting your true nature?
• The connection between disease, healing, and personal power
• Soulspace update – what does your clutter represent?

SPIRITUALITY:

• As you do, so you become
• Permission to be me – a 40th birthday reflection
• What is your personal spiritual curriculum?
• Shining brightly and sharing your gifts
• The empath seeks equanimity

And, of course, MONTHLY BOOK REPORTS

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU AND YOURS!!