The house of belonging

I created this canvas after watching the “belonging” section of Brené Brown’s “Kitchen Table Parenting” series.

Brené teaches:

“Belonging is the innate human desire to be a part of something larger than us.  Because this yearning is so primal, we often try to acquire it by fitting in and seeking approval, which are not only hollow substitutes for belonging, but often barriers to it.”

“If we don’t offer our kids a sense of absolutely no question, no requirement belonging, they will look for it elsewhere.”

“We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honor the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness, and affection.”

So I asked my family what they think of when I say the word “belonging” and got some ideas for the canvas.  I put everyone’s phrases in the artwork.

I’ve tried to fit in probably more than I’ve accepted myself.  Maybe we all do that.  Consciously NOT doing that “fit in” dance is such a relief! If we can accept ourselves, we don’t desperately need anyone else’s approval.

I think of all the terrorist, gang members, drug dealers, and criminals who were only seeking a sense of belonging to something larger than themselves.  If only they had found it from something positive instead.

That unquestioning, unwavering, unconditional love is what home should feel like.

The connection that grows between our family is powerful mainly because we are showing each other our true selves.  When we need to put on an act, it’s less true and therefore less of a connection.

Being seen just as you are, flaws and talents, and being accepted no matter what, feels so good!

That love, I think, is what gives us the ability and permission to go forth into the larger world as our true self.