New house update #7: windows and carpentry

Building a house can easily be a full-time venture.  There’s the back-and-forth e-mails and calls with the window vendor, getting the sizes exact and changing last-minute things; with the appliance vendor, adding a service pantry sink/faucet or changing our freezer size; with the custom cabinetry liaison, asking for interior dimensions or tweaking the order by an inch to allow for just the right size countertop; with the bank, approving funding releases to the builder and tracking the schedule; with three handrail companies, comparing bids and showing visual images of what we are looking for.  There are the regular site visits and many showroom appointments to keep (lighting, tile, cabinetry, flooring, windows, exterior stone).  If a person weren’t organized, you could end up missing a sink or with the incorrect size window glass.

If you’re super OCD like I am, you could also attempt to chronicle the entire process in a scrapbook, regular blog posts, and an app.

* * * * *

Things are not set in stone until they actually are I guess.  While we were at the last stages of pre-build, I could not really imagine what the house would come to look like. Two huge changes that led to a month-long delay: We eliminated a wall of our staircase, opening it up with a cable railing. We also opened up the master closet.  Rather than have a wall dividing the center, it’s now one large area.  Both changes required structural engineering to redraw the plans.

WINDOWS

It took me quite a long time to figure all this out. I began with the measurements that the architect put in the plans and started tweaking from there.  For instance, why would we want a tiny window in the top center of the house? I enlarged that.

In planning the room details, we realized that it would be odd to have a window right behind the guest toilet.  What would you cover it with that would stay clean? So we eliminated that window.

However, I wanted to add a window to our mudroom to let in some natural light.

With those 2 changes, I had to remove a window in the office on the same wall or that side would look odd from the exterior.

CUSTOM CABINETRY

After all this work, as far as I’m concerned, “custom” is a bad word.  It means extra time and thought, as well as the hassle of figuring out finish and trim and measurements down to the millimeter, incorporating plumbing or electric into the design too.

I decided all tile selections a couple months ago, but now it was time to give specific cabinet details – sketch each area where there is custom cabinetry to be built. There are 23 of those.  That took a lot of time and focus.

Of course this is an opportunity to create a home that is exactly perfect for our specific needs.  I can make a counter higher or lower than standard.  I can have a built-in jewelry drawer. I can have the laundry hamper in the closet open up on the other side of the wall into the utility room.

Step 1: List everything that will be stored in each area and your general goals, from your vacuum to your toothbrush.

Step 2: Sketch the room dimensions you are working with, remembering to subtract the difference between exterior and interior walls and where the finished drywall will be.  Begin penciling in and erasing some ideas.

Step 3 to 57: Meet with companies creating specific areas and carpenters to see their work, and get help piecing together organizational inserts you want and where they will go.

Step 58: Think through it once again to make sure you will have a spot for every little thing. Map out where your cake decorating supplies will go and where your can hide the china you never use.

Step 59: Draw final version with relevant details on graph paper.

Last: Turn over drawings to project manager with pictures, any relevant appliance dimensions or electrical needs, and walk through each area to discuss.

THE STORY OF A SERVICE PANTRY

There was once an idea of creating a little nook for wine/drinks and for serving buffet-style food.  I wanted to copy this image on Houzz (left).  We worked with a company called Madeval to create the design (right). Madeval is making our kitchen/service pantry/living room cabinets, as well as our master bath vanity.

That is actually not the original because you can see we were toying with the idea of adding refrigerator/freezer drawers in there, which we decided not to do, and we had added a built-in coffee maker.

We tweaked the shelves many times.  Then we added a sink and faucet, which changed the specs of the lower drawers and cabinets.  I had to make sure to note that we need reinforcement on the back wall for the wine pegs and also make sure that they could be cleanly drilled into the backsplash tile.

In the kitchen, we’ve had many many versions of the design.  Changes with overall design, drawers and cabinet sizes, inserts, lighting, materials, and colors.

Originally we wanted to put an extra fridge in the pantry or mud room, but it became clear when I was sketching the cabinets in there that we don’t have the space for it.  Rather than add those cold drawers in the service pantry, we changed our freezer size from an 18″ column to a 24″ column.

Long story short, to comply with code, we had to eliminate the 2′ wall outside the pantry and build a panel there.  We also went from a door that the architect drew to no door to a pocket door behind the fridge. At this point, we aren’t yet sure if the pocket door will fit or if we’re back to square one.

 

This is not the final version either, but we’ll be placing the order any day.

After many versions of the hood for the range, we decided to build a box for our quartz to adhere to. How much clearance do we need? How to support it? Makes my eyes cross!

Under the sink, we have much to put in a small space because we have U-shaped drawers.  There’s the disposal, but also a filtered water system and hot water tank. Ultimately, I had to go through each appliance and plumbing fixture before placing the Madeval order.

The Container Store is doing our bedroom closets.  We met with California Closets, but the saleswoman drove me batty with her slowness and I just had to move on.  They are very pricey too and I couldn’t get any drawers and cabinets with them without breaking the bank.

So this is our Master closet design from a bird’s eye view.

This is our daughter’s closet:In order to give her deeper drawers on either side, we added 6″ to the framing.

In her bathroom, I wanted to add a little linen closet in this storage closet, which ended up changing the door options.

Here are a couple other rooms that have carpentry we are having the builder make.

LIGHTING AND ELECTRIC

I realized that wiring the house for lighting isn’t as simple as I thought.  I don’t want things in their “usual” places! This is actually about to begin in the next few days so I’m sure there will be more to report.

I wanted to do something whimsical over the kitchen island, so I decided on a grouping of 5 lights very similar to this: 

I’ve been working with a glass light maker in Providence, RI.  This one is going to go in the master bath above the vanity area.

I can’t tell you how much I’m staring at electric plans these days.

In the art room, I’m having them put outlets above my worktable and below it.

HANDRAILS

Long story short, this is what our handrails are going to look like (outdoor on left, indoor on right).

Our latest conundrum… how to connect the garage and garage office to the house.  Everyone has at least 2 ideas.  Stay tuned.

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New house update #6: second story

Remind me not to get his behind again on posting updates. It’s hard to remember back…

Things are looking up!

Sunday, 10/7: While SG is in religious school on Sunday mornings, we have started visiting the house. It’s one of the only times there are not workers there and we can take our time.  I take pictures for my TimeShutter app to watch the progress in specific areas over time. For example, at some point we’ll be able to watch a little video showing progress like this:

Not the best of examples because you’re supposed to stand in exactly the same spot each time and the app guides you with overlays. You get the idea.

So the second floor began and ended rather quickly.

Monday, 10/8: Second floor ceiling and rafter material is on site.  The rain continues to interfere with our progress but the end is in sight!

Wednesday, 10/10: Second floor ceiling complete this morning. Rafters will continue through Thursday. Excellent progress on the house today… hopefully we can keep this great weather up.

Thursday, 10/11: Rafters continue. Framer will continue with purlins and fire blocking. Wind storm clips and straps expected to start Tuesday of next week.

(I often have to Google words that our Project Manager uses! A “purlin,” I learned, is a long structural roof beam.)

Friday, 10/12: Rafters to continue through Monday.  Next week, we’ll concentrate on windstorm clips and straps and inspect by Friday. The following week, we will start exterior sheathing and have that inspected by that Friday for nail pattern with the City.

We had a Project Update meeting and discussed possible solutions for connecting the house to our existing garage and room overhead.  Keep the stairs from downstairs to office? Eliminate them and just have an upper breezeway? What about the fact that the second floor of the house is 4.5 feet higher than the second floor of the garage? To be continued.

Tuesday, 10/16: Windstorm inspection set for tomorrow. Sheathing to arrive Thursday.

Wednesday, 10/17: City structural inspector drove by home and called inspection not ready!! Never left his vehicle.  Our project manager called his boss to report it. Framers kept working on fire-blocking. Windstorm inspection has been recalled for tomorrow.

Thursday, 10/18: Same City inspector came out today and this time got out of his vehicle to pass Windstorm inspection. Exterior sheathing arrived today and will begin this afternoon until mid-week next week.  Nail-pattern inspection with the City of Houston for exterior sheathing is tentatively scheduled for Wednesday next week.

My next house post will be all about the little details of cabinetry measurements, windows, and lighting.  Fun stuff! Thanks for reading!

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October update and book report

It’s been quite a busy month here.

  • We were all very taken up with the Astros winning their Division and hopefully moving forward to the World Series again, but that was just not meant to be this year.
  • Weather changes have brought us glorious morning skies.

  • Our two crazy kitties keep me on my toes.  One has to sleep in a separate room because she’s a typical kitten at night. The other wakes me up at 4am without fail, and I’ll get up and shut her in our laundry room before going back to sleep.
  • The school book fair is in about 3 weeks, which means it’s finally time to start doing things instead of simply planning them.  I have an assistant for this: 
  • I straightened my hair one day and picked up SG at school… she did not recognize me at all! She thought I was “some lady” and was looking for her mom.

  • Our house is really coming along.  It is now completely framed and almost finished being wrapped.  Windows arrive today!
  • I got a new puzzle app on my phone (Jigsaw Puzzle) and it’s pretty hard to put it down. I guess there are worse things.
  • The Mussar class that I have been facilitating for a few months is ending today with our last topic and a bit of a celebration.  I made little art gifts for each participant and have been squeezing in time here and there to work on them. I had my helper for this too: 
  • I voted, cleared out our garage, got a flu shot, toured some middle schools, had lunch with friends, walked most mornings, went to our downtown art festival, led a Girl Scout meeting, and spoke on a panel discussion for our religious school about being involved in the community.
  • I finally returned the 4 chairs from Target that I’d ordered to use in our rental house kitchen (but didn’t like). They have been sitting in my garage for almost a full year!
  • And I’ve been reading… I saw this tshirt on Facebook and thought it was hilarious. If you don’t want to read my reviews, I’ll skip ahead and tell you you must read Meet Me at the Museum: A Novel by Anne Youngson. It’s a sweet, slightly sorrowful, and beautiful story.  I’m about to begin An American Marriage by Tayari Jones.
  • Posts coming very soon on the house and some art projects!

You’ve Been So Lucky Already: A Memoir by Alethea Black

Just after grieving her father’s death, Alethea develops an illness.  The book seems to flit randomly to various points in her life, telling of childhood memories and reflections.  I just could not finish this one.  I read about half and didn’t like the way Black rambled on and on about her feelings about what I think is an invented mental illness.

“You’re halfway through the movie when you discover that you’re crying, which is strange, because it isn’t even a sad movie. You’re crying because it’s good. On this day, when the movie ends, the other people get up and file out of the theater, talking and chewing their gum, as if they haven’t just been present at a miracle. Because that’s the way it always is: first, miracle, then: time to make the chicken. But on this day, you don’t get up. You don’t get up because you don’t want it to be over. So you continue to sit there, silently holding your Kit Kat wrapper in your seat at the back, long after the music has stopped and the lights have come on and everyone else has gone home.”

Mrs. Poe by Lynn Cullen

Edgar Allen Poe, his wife, and his mistress (who tells the story). I’m not quite sure that the premise of this novel is a solid one, but regardless, the writing was definitely engaging.  This is a novel best read by someone who doesn’t know many facts about American history or literature of the early 19th century.  Cullen paints Poe to be a sex magnet, confuses various personalities of their literary salon, and shows the excessive emotion of Osgood while leaving out her brain.

“Slowly, I lifted my eyes to meet his.  I would not look away even though it was wrong for me to interact with a married man in this intimate manner.  And what I saw within his dark-rimmed eyes – not just with my own eyes, but perceived powerfully, clearly, with an unnamed sense – made my chest ache with joyous recognition.  A smile of wonder bloomed simultaneously upon our faces.”

And this, on writing: “I sat back, wrung out, as I always am after I have brought forth a true and honest work, regardless of its subject or length.  It is as if producing a creative work tears a piece from your soul.  When it is ripped completely free of you, the wound must bleed for a while.  How similar it is to letting go of a dream, your hope, or your heart’s desire. You must open up and let it drain.”

There Are No Grown-ups: A Midlife Coming-of-Age Story by Pamela Druckerman

The way Druckerman writes is humorous with just the right amount of neuroticism thrown in. I really loved her book about parenting her children in France and how things are vastly different.  Here she shares her shock that being in ones forties leads to changes: people call her “madame” and treat her differently; she is expected to be “the person in charge;” she wants to try new things “before it’s too late.” Each chapter ends with a list of “You Know You’re In Your 40’s When…” and I think those are the best part of the book.  It’s an honest, quick read.

“Even in France, being ‘comfortable in your age’ doesn’t happen automatically.  It’s a deliberate, adult act. It requires believing that your particular shape, mind, and assortment of qualities — including your age — have a valid place in the world.  It means making a choice about how you’re going to age.  And it means believing that the person in the mirror is you.”

Some of her advice:

  • If you’re wondering whether she’s the daughter or the girlfriend, she’s probably the girlfriend.  
  • Never wave at someone while wearing short sleeves.
  • Do not buy the too-small jeans with the expectation that you will soon lose weight.
  • It’s okay if you don’t like jazz.

At the Strangers’ Gate: Arrivals in New York by Adam Gopnik

I’m a big fan of Gopnik and his writing in The New Yorker and was excited to read this memoir of his first encounters in New York in the 80’s. The first few chapters were engaging… the tiny shoebox that he and his wife Martha lived in, his early employment, his failed attempts at cooking, the lovely reminiscences (is that a word?) of his marriage in the beginning.  However, most of the rest of the book is about the art scene at the time. I just wasn’t interested in that.  I still love Gopnik’s friendly and conversational tone and his vocabulary in general. I won’t count this book against him… I’ll still read whatever he comes out with next.

How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success by Julie Lythcott-Haims

Truly, an excellent read about parents who do far too much to shelter children from any sort of strife… and how we are ultimately causing them to be unprepared for life without us.  I think every parent should read this one.  It’s as applicable to preschool as it is to college applications.  Since reading it, I’ve pushed Sweet Girl to do even more on her own. Having scientific evidence that it’s good for her in the long run makes it even easier to do. As for all the academic pressure, I agree that there’s more to life than getting in to the top 100 universities. If I have to criticize one thing about this excellent and practical book, it’s that she focuses too much on the university admission process. I know that is her area of expertise though, so she’s forgiven.

The Soul of America: The Battle for Our Better Angels by Jon Meacham

We are not unique in the current politics of fear.  “Extremism, racism, nativism, and isolationism, driven by fear of the unknown, tend to spike in periods of economic and social stress—a period like our own.”  This book tells of our American history, our best moments and those from darker times, and how we ultimately moved forward.  Times of public despair are not new to us, and it’s helpful to learn from what came before.

“The opposite of fear is hope, defined as the expectation of good fortune not only for ourselves but for the group to which we belong. Fear feeds anxiety and produces anger; hope, particularly in a political sense, breeds optimism and feelings of well-being. Fear is about limits; hope is about growth. Fear casts its eyes warily, even shiftily, across the landscape; hope looks forward, toward the horizon. Fear points at others, assigning blame; hope points ahead, working for a common good. Fear pushes away; hope pulls others closer. Fear divides; hope unifies.”

Dear Committee Members: A Novel by Julie Schumacher

Told as a series of letters of recommendation interspersed with letters to colleagues, we learn the whole history of a sad creative writing professor and his struggles. It’s meant to be smart and witty, but it ends up being tedious.  It was rough going to get to the end.

A Paradise Called Texas by Janice Jordan Shefelman and Tom Shefelman

The story of a German family looking for a better life in America in 1845.  Sweet Girl is reading this in school, so I read it to be able to talk about it with her.  Fourth grade is all things Texas history. I enjoyed this one and will probably get the other books in this series.

Just the Funny Parts: …And a Few Hard Truths About Sneaking Into the Hollywood Boys’ Club” by Nell Scovell

I read this one because the author is coming to Houston for our Jewish Book/Arts Fair in a couple of weeks.  I am part of the small group of people that have not seen any of the shows she mentions writing for.  I enjoyed her observations about women in the media and the advice she gives about finding your voice, failing and moving on, etc, but most of this book had too little substance for me.  I did, however, love the Sheryl Sandberg introduction. 🙂

Meet Me at the Museum: A Novel by Anne Youngson

Truly a delightful little book! It reminded me a little of The Bridges of Madison County in that it was a late-in-life accidental discovery of a kindred spirit.  We get to know the two main characters in their letters to each other as they grow closer.  This is a tender and beautiful book – a must read!

“Our letters have meant so much to us because we have both arrived at the same point in our lives. More behind us than ahead of us.” 

“I thought of the words we have used to each other, you and I, in describing our lives – mine bound up in the relentless timetable of food production, yours buried in the fossilized remains of the past.  It is hard for us to say, isn’t it, that nothing is so fixed it cannot be altered? The seasons do not linger waiting for it to be convenient for the sowing and the harvesting. The artifacts you study are what they are. They represent a moment in time. They have no scope for change; that is why you study them. That is shy they are useful for telling us things we might otherwise  never have known.  I begin to think we have been misled by the types of lives we lead into overlooking our personal potential to be other than we have always been.”

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We are all refugees

We decorated the front of our house for Halloween this year. Really, it was just a minimal fall-themed dusting compared to what some of our neighbors do.  Sweet Girl has gotten really into it, straightening the little pumpkin flag often and decorating our pumpkins. So it was natural that when we were at a craft store yesterday and saw some Chanukah decorations (amidst the onslaught of red and green), that she would ask if we could decorate our front door in blue and white.  Besides the fact that Chanukah has been blown way out of proportion recently in our country and there is absolutely no reason to decorate, I am honestly fearful of advertising my religion given the state of our world these days.

When the shooting at a Parkland high school happened last February, I wondered if I should tell SG anything about it. I decided not to. When her school participated in a state-wide minute of silence in May in memory of the victims, I wondered if she’d know the reason and if I should prepare her, but she said it was something about remembering to include all people and call them by their name. (There is a new initiative in Houston schools to promote social inclusion.)

Then there was another shooting much closer to us in Santa Fe, TX, also in May, and I didn’t mention a thing.  I have no way of guaranteeing her that it wouldn’t happen in her school, and since SG has trouble going to school on a good day, I’d have a lot more needless drama on my hands.

I served on a committee a couple of years ago that granted funding to The Holocaust Museum here in Houston to pilot a program in the schools called “Educator in Motion,” which provides educational programming on the Holocaust, genocide, social cruelty, and active citizenship.  There are a number of options depending on time available and the age of the students.  So when SG’s teacher put a note at the end of an e-mail to ask our kids about the special program they were going to presented by The Holocaust Museum, I made sure that it was the one for the young kids focusing on learning skills to identify and respond to social cruelty. I know she’s not ready to know the facts just yet.

Today, Sweet Girl and I were participating at a Girl Scout volunteer event when Mr. B texted me that there was a mass shooting at a synagogue near where we used to live in Pittsburgh.  We have many friends that go there or who live in Squirrel Hill so I immediately headed home to check on them.  Thank you, Facebook, for making that so easy. All are ok.

I have written about this before. I want SG to have a childhood free from much knowledge of politics, hatred, and violence.  I want her to learn good things about the world around her and how our society works.  What are we supposed to tell our kids when this happens?

In this case, I had the news report on in the car on our way home. I tried to explain that some people feel very strongly about things that are based on distorted thinking. I told her about how I donated money to rebuild a mosque here that was recently burned down as a hate crime.  I told her that even though we are just like everyone else, being slightly different in this one aspect gives some people a reason to hate us without even knowing us.  “How did he get a gun, mom?” Exactly.

We watched a few minutes of the coverage and then turned it off.  We answered a few questions and pointed out all the people who were helping.  We casually mentioned how safe we feel at our temple with its required ID tags and security guards and locked doors. (I hope it’s not a false sense of security.) And we were honest that this really stinks.

The reason this hits home more than even the Santa Fe shooting down the road is that we know those people. We lived and worked in that community for years.  Some of the people that the news are interviewing are our friends.  Squirrel Hill is such a special community with a small-village feel.  The sewing repair shop on the corner has been open for at least 80 years.  Walking down the street to synagogue on a Shabbat morning is such an ordinary occurrence there,  you’d not even think twice about it.  The fact that you could lose your life all of a sudden just by walking down that street stuns me.

And for what? There is no sense to these acts, yet we are all so vulnerable. I have to admit that I think about something like this happening just about every time we go to temple, and especially on holidays when there are hundreds of people gathered there.  But I do not want my child to grow up fearing being in a place where she should find comfort and strength.  I especially do not want her to be ashamed of her religion because it makes her seem different from the average American citizen. I thought all Americans were once immigrants and refugees.

Maybe there are some American families that can trace their roots back to the 16th century.  Most people I know are second- or third-generation Americans.  Some are still becoming citizens.  Unless you know that someone in your family crossed the Bering Strait thousands of years ago, aren’t you too a refugee of some sort in this melting pot? Everyone came from somewhere else, even Robert Bowers.

When we were living in Pittsburgh, I worked in Community Relations at the Jewish Federation.  Events like these cause a whirlwind of outreach, activity, and programming. The reactive nature of that job and the helplessness I felt despite working to change legislation, despite dialogues with every religious community leader and their mother, despite the long hours, is one reason I felt I had to leave that role.  It is not the people around the table or in the audience at our programs that are the root of the hatred. It was not productive for me to be in the middle of it all, reading multiple newspapers every day and hearing about every hate crime in the world.

What bothers me the most is that events like these are becoming more common in our country.  Maybe it’s at a school, a mosque, or a church. “God bless America?” We need a moral leader who denounces acts of hate, anti-semitism, and racism.  Why should anyone be persecuted in our safe places?

What has to happen for someone to believe in white supremacy and violence? They truly believe they are doing a good thing and helping the world.  I just don’t know what to do besides channeling my energy into spreading kindness and acceptance and raising my child not to live in fear but to be aware (as needed) and proceed anyway because there are far more good people in the world than anyone else.

May the memory of those lives lost today be a blessing.

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New house update #5: higher still

This is SO EXCITING! I am guessing this part of the process is going to be my favorite because we’re creating something out of thin air. First there was nothing. Now there is the structure of a house.

  • I’ve collected a few bids for interior and exterior railings.  The choices seem endless.
  • We are finalizing our appliance order – long story.  Basically we don’t have anywhere to put an extra refrigerator now that I can visualize the spaces.  So we are trying to get larger units without compromising our kitchen design. We may be able to narrow the doorway to the pantry to accomplish this.
  • I’ve been shopping for lighting.
  • Still working on cabinet sketches.

As we wrap up this week, the framers are working on the second story. Here’s a recap of the past 2 weeks on the job site.

Tuesday 9/25:  Trusses are being re-stamped by engineer due to changes and will deliver by Friday. 1st floor continues this week.

Wednesday 9/28: Light delivery – I wish I’d thought to take a picture of the cats playing on the enormous box.  This is a 51″ square LED light fixture that will go in our living room.  For now, it’s taking up a lot of room in our garage!

Thursday 9/27:  Trusses arrived this morning. Trusses will continue thru Monday. Second floor walls arrive Tuesday. I had no idea what trusses were until I google it. 🙂 That’s the case with a lot of this process.

We had a meeting with the builder and gave them some lighting placement updates and walked the house. Things are moving along quickly.

Friday 9/28: Framing for trusses continued today. Decking for second floor installing Monday.

The quiet part is crucial! In our rental house, it sounds like elephants live here.

Sunday 9/30: We stopped by and noticed that the foyer had trusses, which means it was going to have a ceiling.  That’s not what we decided! After I mentioned it to the PM though, he told me he was already on the case. The plans from the engineer are different from the architect ones.

Monday 10/1: Trusses to complete today. Subfloor decking begins Tuesday, weather permitting. Still forecasted at 50% rain today 40% tomorrow. Framer is on site this morning – reviewing plan discrepancies.  Second floor walls arrive tomorrow.

Tuesday 10/2: Stopped by and foyer trusses were removed.  Foyer will be 20 ft.

Wednesday 10/3: There are stairs and wood ready for second floor framing.  Guys were completing the second floor subfloor. I didn’t realize someone was looking my way until now.

Thursday 10/4: Started second floor framing!

Enjoy the weekend!

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September reading and update

“Books to me are portals to the unknown — a place where the mind can rest and rage simultaneously.  Books make the future imaginable and the past tolerable.  They widen the scope of human existence by telling individual stories of grace, strength, wit, and sadness.  They make me want to live deeper and better.” ~ Eve Stone

Let’s see… October already. The other day, a company called to schedule delivery of a light fixture and the first date available was September 26. I freaked out… for some reason, that date sounded like it was 2 months away.  Lol. I don’t really know how the time is passing so quickly!

Our house is coming up quickly all of a sudden. Here’s the latest on that:

We’re finalizing our kitchen cabinet order and sketching out all our other cabinets.  In the next couple of days, we’ll have steps up to a second floor!

Sweet Girl is loving fourth grade and doing homework as soon as she gets home each day without complaint.  That’s a huge improvement! We started our Girl Scout year, observed the Jewish holidays, and went to a Kidz Bop concert and an Astros game.  (We’re on to the playoffs next week!) I met with my book fair planning committee to get that ball rolling.

My nephew had his bar mitzvah this past weekend and it was an excellent time from beginning to end.  I loved seeing family and special friends we don’t get to see very often. My sister and brother-in-law did a stellar job on every little detail. I cannot believe how grown up her little baby is all of a sudden! It feels like last year that I made his baby scrapbook. And, of course, I was taking notes for SG’s bat mitzvah in 3 years. Eek.

Enjoy the book reviews.  Of them all, I’d highly recommend Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover. Also, right now I’m reading Yuval Noah Harari’s 21 Lessons for the 21st Century, from which I’m learning quite a bit.  Please share your recommendations!

The Masterpiece: a Novel by Fiona Davis

I’d been waiting for this one to be released since I loved her 2 previous novels and got this right away from the library.  It’s about a down-on-her-luck divorced woman who moves to New York and has to take a job helping in the information booth at Grand Central Station.  Now that I think of it, all 3 of her main characters move to NYC from another small-town location at the beginning of her novels.  Anyway, this one, Virginia, stumbles upon an art school that was upstairs when the place was brand new.  As Fiona Davis loves to do, she alternates between this story and 40 years prior, when Clara was an instructor in that very art school.  Clara is struggling to make a living as well. We learn of her determination to make something of herself and her fight against the current of the times.  Of course paths collide in an unlikely way and the story unfolds.

I loved it.  It felt like I knew each and every character well and I enjoyed the peek into the art scene in the 1940s. It’s a quick but fun and interesting read.

“The first time she’d entered the hallowed space, stepping off the train from Arizona last September, she’d stopped and stared, her mouth open, until a man brushed past her, swearing under his breath at her inertia.  The vastness of the main concourse, where sunshine beamed through the giant windows and bronze chandeliers glowed, left her gobsmacked.  With its exhilarating mix of light, air, and movement, the terminal was the perfect location for a school of art.”

“… even if she didn’t speak like they did, her confidence and passion in her own work were unwavering.  When she drew or painted, it was as if an unseen hand guided her own.  She’d never been able to explain that to anyone.  To her, painting was an internal expression, not a political or social one.  She didn’t have a manifesto or an affiliation, other than to please herself doing what she loved to do and make money doing it.  The first part was easy — the second, more elusive.”

“Look at me.  No one knows what I am.  But I don’t care, because I love the way I  move in the world.  I love my perspective on the world.  I’ve earned it, and anyone else can go to hell.  I wouldn’t have wanted to paint you if I didn’t think you were a fascinating subject: a woman of a certain age, with the wounds to prove it.  That’s what interests me.  Desperate to cover those wounds but still carrying them capably.  A woman who is just learning her own strength.”

The Weight of Ink by Rachel Kadish

“Today, when he’d peered under that staircase, it was as though what he’d starved for all these lifeless moths of dissertation research had been restored to him.  History, reaching out and caressing his face once more, the way it had years ago as he sat reading at his parents’ kitchen table.  The gentle, insistent touch of something like a conscience, stilling him.  Waking him to a lucid new purpose.”

My absolute favorite book is A.S. Byatt’s Possession, a story of two researchers who discover old letters and documents…. I picked up The Weight of Ink not knowing it is amazingly similar! It tells of two women 400 years apart – one daring to study and pen letters to famous philosophers in secret as she scribes for a blind rabbi, the other an historian. 1660s London and Amsterdam was a time and place when Jews had to hide their identity in some places and women were not permitted to study.

This novel recently won the National Jewish Book Award and is our Community Read for the Jewish Book and Art Festival here in November.  Every character is developed completely and all the historical details are accurate.  History. Theology. Religion.  Philosophy.  Sexuality. The role of women.  There are many levels to the stories in the novel and really no way to give you an accurate account here.  Just know that it’s very much worth a read! It’s an exceptional book.

“She knew she’d no right to call this feeling love, when she betrayed the rabbi daily.  Yet even in her own writing, when she posed questions he’d regard as blasphemy, she carried the rabbi ever in her mind, and his goodness remained the standard against which she tested her understanding of the world.  It was the highest love she was capable of: respect… The greatest act of love — indeed, the only religion she could comprehend — was to speak the truth about the world.  Love must be, then, an act of truth-telling, a baring of mind and spirit just as ardent as the baring of the body.  Truth and passion were one, and each impossible without the other.”

Love and Ruin: A Novel by Paula McLain

This is a fictionalized story of the relationship between Ernst Hemingway and Martha Gellhorn, his third wife.  Both were successful writers and wartime correspondents. Told from Gellhorn’s perspective, the story highlights how the relationship changed over time because Hemingway struggled with Gellhorn’s need for independence.

I enjoyed watching how each approached their writing, learning about the friends and family they surrounded themselves with, what it might be like to be a war-time journalist.

It made me feel shaky and horribly lonely—and brought Spain back more sharply. Anything and anyone could disappear on you, and you could disappear, too, if you didn’t have people around who really knew you. Who were there solidly, meeting you exactly where you stood when life grew stormy and terrifying. Who could find you when you were lost and couldn’t find yourself, not even in the mirror.

“The places I’d just been and the people who’d moved me were with me, ready to feed my work. And I saw now, in a way I hadn’t before, how having Ernest made it possible for me to go away and return, changed and stronger, and better, and more myself somehow… I didn’t want to have this life with Ernest and my work to prove I could have everything. I needed them both in order to feel whole.”

Everything That Remains: A Memoir by The Minimalists, Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus

Imagine a friendly, intent young guy sitting down with you at a coffee shop for a couple hours to tell you how he made all sorts of improvements in his life, and you have this fine book.  Each topic has it’s own stories and anecdotes, which unfold in the book. It’s about how our possessions box us in, how we can free ourselves from being perpetually unsatisfied, that goals and achievement aren’t the path to finding your passion, and that careers shouldn’t define our core identity.  I like how he equates getting organized as being nothing more than “well-planned hoarding.”

“We all know instinctually how to declutter—how to get “organized.” But that’s just one part of the larger issue. Instead of “get organized,” I’ve decided I need to start thinking of organizing as a dirty word, a sneaky little profanity who keeps us from really simplifying our lives.”

“…we tend to hang on to things—jobs, relationships, material possessions—in an effort to feel secure. But many of the things we cling to in search of security actually drain the satisfaction from our lives, leaving us discontented and overwhelmed.”

Ultimately, by sharing his own experiences on this path, Joshua wants us see how good it feels to make room in our lives for what we find most fulfilling.   “It’s only after we’ve lost everything that we’re free to do anything.” It’s a quick read and very engaging.

The Air You Breathe: A Novel by Frances de Pontes Peebles

A coming-of-age story about two girls growing up in 1930s Brazil and then 1940s Hollywood who are nothing alike and yet become something like friends.  I didn’t love this one.  I didn’t really like the characters, nor the way Peebles kept going back and forth from the present to the past.  The book made for slow reading.

Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover

The journey from a very small life in Idaho (not even going to school – her parents were anti-establishment Mormons) to earning a PhD from Cambridge  through sheer internal will.  Along the way, there is the mental instability of most of her immediate family members, extreme abuse to overcome, and quite a lot to learn about society and functioning in the world.  That Tara was able to change her future is amazing and just remarkable.  This story is gripping, inspiring, and captivating.  Highly recommend.

“Everything I had worked for, all my years of study, had been to purchase for myself this one privilege: to see and experience more truths than those given to me by my father, and to use those truths to construct my own mind. I had come to believe that the ability to evaluate many ideas, many histories, many points of view, was at the heart of what it means to self-create. If I yielded now, I would lose more than an argument. I would lose custody of my own mind. This was the price I was being asked to pay, I understood that now. What my father wanted to cast from me wasn’t a demon: it was me.”

And at the end, one of her mentors told her, “You are not fool’s gold, shining only under a particular light. Whomever you become, whatever you make yourself into, that is who you always were. It was always in you. Not in Cambridge. In you. You are gold. And returning to BYU, or even to that mountain you came from, will not change who you are. It may change how others see you, it may even change how you see yourself—even gold appears dull in some lighting—but that is the illusion. And it always was.”

Fear: Trump in the White House by Bob Woodward

There are definitely going to be some readers who’ll be shocked by this book.  I’m not one of them.  Obviously there’s chaos in the White House, the country being “tethered to the words and actions of an emotionally overwrought, mercurial and unpredictable leader.” What I didn’t realize was just how much Trump was going to try to show up for work! Despite his stunned disbelief that he woke up the day after the election to be POTUS, he actually seems to want to make some changes instead of just playing golf and watching Fox News 24/7.

What I found more than amusing was reading about those who surround the President.  They evade him repeatedly in the hope that he’ll forget his ideas (and he does have a mercurial mind), cause executive orders to “disappear” from his desk before they’re signed, and try to provide reasons that convince him that his ideas may not be such great ideas, or at least, that there are long, thought-out reasons why things are set up the way they are, and that there would be severe global consequences for changing things as he thinks best.  They seem to arrange for “Being President 101” seminars for him often.

Just about nothing is following the policy process at the White House as it’s meant to.  Departments that are meant to confer with others are not doing so.  Some individuals are thwarting entire committees to make decisions on their own.  It’s absolute chaos.  There is no logic to how the President makes his decisions, besides perhaps emotionally reacting to what he sees in the media.  I think I read the entire book with my eyebrows raised in amusement.

“The president did not understand the importance of allies overseas, the value of diplomacy or the relationship between the military, the economy and intelligence partnerships with foreign governments.”

“As if there were no American interests in forging and keeping a peaceful world order, as if the American organizing principle was money.”

The chapters span from before his nomination to today, covering topics such as immigration, racial divisions, tax reforms, North Korea, South Korea, Afghanistan, Iran, Pakistan, NATO, and trade.  he sad result is that our greatest fears about Trump, his bullish, disrespectful and offensive character, and his inability to constructively contribute to a domestic and international political and economic agenda have a solid foundation, and are not just a front.

A good third of the book is a listing of Woodward’s sources: interviews, meeting notes, personal diaries, files and documents.  Given who Woodward is, I have to believe most of his account of life in the White House.  Despite it’s complete nuttiness, it’s actually better than I had thought! We already knew he doesn’t “work well with others.” A liar.  Disrespectful.  Ignorant.  We knew he isn’t very analytical (or even moral) in his decision-making.  Now we need to get him to understand that he’s not just running another business here… there’s more at stake that he really cares about.

And I just have to say again that despite having read more than a handful of books about the recent polarization of our country, many from viewpoints opposite my own, I still don’t understand why anyone would have voted for him.  I just don’t get it at all. THAT is what shocks me.

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