Since writing this post early last week, there have been more discoveries that I look forward to sharing with you. The main point: ENJOY your life. Thoughts can be clutter too.
Too much stuff. Too many commitments. Too many comparisons. Clutter. (Too little time, space, and peace.)
Before we left home for our Disney cruise at the end of December, I straightened the house as much as possible so we would be coming home to a fresh and clean space. Cruise ship rooms aren’t the most spacious of accommodations, so I’d already been thinking of how to streamline all of our things stuff “made in China” crap. Entering our house anew, with the perspective that a week away gives you, it was rather obvious what was “extra” or out of place and what was essential. Being me, I set about tossing things and rearranging, but in a different manner than ever before.
This time, I wasn’t feeling harried, angry at the accumulation of clutter/possessions, or in much of a rush. I even decided to do this piecemeal, moving on to do other things before I was even finished (quite unlike me!).
Decluttering
You may remember that I do this decluttering thing just about every New Year. I just came across this checklist from last year. So instead of deciding with a big fanfare, “Ok, that’s it! We are tackling this right now,” I instead am working on a little bit at a time, being nice to myself all the while, and I think I’m getting close to being done.
Having already tackled most of my house last year, I really only need to look at our sentimental belongings and a few closets. Small steps are the key here, I think. I’ll keep you posted as I go.
Slowing down
What else is different? I am not taking any classes. I am ok with not attending all board meetings. I am keeping things low key and loving it. I am happy to have the space in my day between activities. You see, I had been canceling self-care things like reading or a massage because I felt I didn’t have the time. I was “busy” and not available to simply watch life unfold.
Since all the activity was too much, which became clear on our trip away as well, I thought about what I could let go of. Eventually, on the trip, we decided (secretly so as not to upset our daughter) that we didn’t need to stand in every single character line to get signatures and to meet them all. We didn’t need to do everything that was offered. And by the last couple of days, things were easier.
I can’t find the words to describe the sense of relief I feel in not requiring myself to do it all. I bet you know what I mean anyway. And that there is no rush to do this housework is even better. I am very proud of myself and hope I can keep this mindset!
A reassuring reminder
I decided to write down how I’m feeling and what I’m thinking so that if my mindset changes, I will have a reminder. I share it here because I think it will help you too.
Dear Naomi… remember that you are creative and intelligent, strong and full of ideas. You have love surrounding you from all areas, so you never have to do something to earn someone else’s love or respect. You create a vibe in your home and family that is positive and fun and accepting of others. You are compassionate and free-spirited. Remember that it’s ok to do a u-turn when you’re driving somewhere because you saw something that you want to photograph. These are the important moments. Put aside the immediate task and really look at who your daughter and husband ARE, right this minute. These moments are fleeting. In ten years, your 7-year-old will be 17 and quite a different person.
Take care of yourself and the body that houses you. Treating it with respect will allow it to carry you forward for many, many years. Stretch. Put in healthy fuel. Take baths and get massages. Appreciate it more. Focus on your breath and close your eyes sometimes.
Remember that idea that there is far more distance to travel inside than outside of yourself. How will you have time to travel within if you are so busy “with-out?”
Streamline everything. What do you need to live a full life? Is something creating visual clutter? Toss it. Is it blocking your natural path? Move it. If you haven’t used it in a few months, give it away. Make getting dressed simpler by having only clothes that you love wearing. Make working in the kitchen easier by having a place for everything and if it doesn’t fit, paring down even more.
Toss that lotion you bought when you were 27. You are not going to use it. Scan in all those old photos and toss the originals and you’ve got almost an entire new closet (which you won’t fill with new stuff). Recycle the holiday cards. Put all the cute artwork in a keepsake box in one place. No guilt allowed. Imagine everything you toss or donate will be used by someone who will treasure it and use it far more than you would have.
Before you commit to anything, think hard about why you are doing it. Do you want someone’s approval? Do you feel that you should? Is it for someone else or for you? Do you enjoy this thing? You do not need to do anything beyond being your amazing self. You don’t need to learn something new unless you want to. You don’t need to volunteer for something out of worry that no one else will. You don’t need to show effort toward a cause in order to prove anything. Be YOU, which will naturally invoke joy and pleasure in all tasks.